Mostly good days though today is def. a daze

Only really having meltdowns that last a short time & don't rage all day now, yay! Seriously not getting good sleep though, keep falling asleep with one or other of the kids. Anyway procrastinating badly as i really need to be packing & posting TM sales & finishing a newsletter that should have been out two weeks ago.. aarrgghh. So want to study at the Learning Connexion after going to the exhibition the other day.

Winter

Well, it's been a while, but winter doesn't have me so depressed this year. After battling PND again & having some success with acupuncture, it just got too expensive to continue and I having greater success with medication. So that will be helping the winter blues, but I am trying to get to bed at a decent hour & get more exercise, so all helpful. Creative-ness is returning to my brain in bits & pieces. Though actually sitting down to much has been fairly elusive. Kids have had lengthy colds, so that is all time consuming. Goals currently, regular bedtimes & exercise, get cushions selling in shops, get some art displayed down at the local gallery & continue to get the house into order.

Getting more stitchy

Made a skirt into a pair of pants, made a pocket nappy (tho too small for Z!), have started bibs & a singlet, have been making bread lots & baking every few days. Have a few felted pin cushions, but broke my needle so need to get more & then be more gentle!! Must download some pics again soon, they make me feel creative & help to inspire. Been a busy sch holidays so will be good when school goes back so I can try to get a routine going. Esp to include some house cleaning now my motivation has improved. Anyway a few things to do before a not too late night. Wow a post & it hasn't even been a mth!

Ok, so I am a monthly blogger

Rather than a daily or even weekly! I have started being creative again though so that is the main thing. And along with some help from acupuncture, I am feeling lots better. When my house has been finished, paint-wise as well as the other bits & pieces started, things can settle into "homes" & it should all go more smoothly. Though finishing could be some time yet... I have to go to bed, too late yet again, but old habits die hard. Oops, looked at lovely crafty blogs too long & forgot about the dishes, oh well, they will keep. The kids usually have me up nice & early, so i can sort it then. Hopefully some posts with pics soon to show my crafty stuffs. Oh & went to a spinners & weavers demonstration recently & planning to join & go regularly, yay!

Yay I'm back :-)

So it's now mid March, the year is speeding by. We have just had L's 6th b'day party, he is growing up too fast! Z has just taken his first steps last weekend at only 10mths old, he now thinks it'll be fun to learn to run & esp. climb!! Due to the party the house is for the first time in MONTHS tidy & somewhat clean. It is so refreshing. I actually feel at home for the first time in ages. Having fessed up to myself and then others that I have PND again I have been having acupuncture treatments & they are working, yay! I can function again and not scream like a banshee. Looking forward to a few weeks of feeling better so i can let the guilt of how I have been parenting go and see the kids enjoying mummy. And so hubby doesn't have to run home to rescue me from being unable to make tea & think! Next challenge is to get creative. My new "studio" is almost complete so I will have a dedicated space with doors... Sounds better than it is when I say it that way, though I am very happy with it, it is actually an oversize cupboard :-) I made tomato sauce for the first time ever so did some arty pics to post...

We have also had the good fortune to enjoy some HUGE plums this year, cleverly getting them before the birds did.

And my creativity extended to decorating a garlic bread plate for a friends wedding... this is the arty doctored photo version!, not sure if i have downloaded the finished kiln fired one, really must give it to them now....

Ok off to bed as last night was super late getting ready the party, really must get the study painted next & then get on top of the gardens.

Searching for clarity

Though it is rather elusive. So lost with where I am and where I am going. And so messed up chemically inside that nothing is familiar or right. I can't even just dissolve into tears like I always used to, they just won't flow. A bet with my lovely husband to cease to yell for a whole month is going to be a HUGE challenge, but well worth it & will be good for all. 47 minutes down & so far so good - he he. API, LLL, Mum4Mum, work, Toy Library, starting a business, being a mum, running the house, cooking, cleaning, it all feels so weighty. L isn't getting nearly enough time spent with him and he is so imaginative & lovely. Z is getting older by the second and I am so desperately sad that he is our last baby. More so that I just wouldn't cope with any more children, that it is a decision made for me by my fruitloopy-ness (to put it in a nice funny way :-). He has quite a temper at times and I so don't want him to become like me. Neither of them. I better get some sleep having done nil tonight was ok, but I need to start achieving some of my plans & get to a base where I can mentally make some decisions. The clutter in the house is getting attacked in minute doses, so I guess we are moving forward, just not even at baby step pace, so tedious in many ways and now we have been hit by the return from holiday (such that it was) and Christmas pressie bomb. The garden is becoming uncluttered so that is also good. Action action action. Goodnight me.